God And His Feedback Mechanism

It is that time of the year when world over companies and corporates carry out an exercise called ‘appraisals’. A sum and substance of one’s performance, evaluation and feedback.

During one such discussion my boss and I walked from a meeting room to a coffee shop. The conversation continued. It moved out of the four walls of professional space to a much wider and broader spectrum of life. From performance evaluation & improvement to self-evaluation & excellence.

I wondered aloud, “sometimes I feel it would have been nice to have a similar review with God. Where we can talk about our achievements and areas of improvement. At least we would know if our self-assessment is correct or not.”

My boss smiled, “but that’s why he has given you a mother and a mother-in-law!!”

Oh My God!!!! Its soooo true.

I do have a mother. I have a mother-in-law too.

And I am sure you'll understand what it means if you also have them with you.

They always tell me when and where I am going wrong. From my dress to my food. From professional counsel to marriage advise. From running household errands to managing finances. From arranging my cupboard to structuring my thoughts for the next blog. From me being a wife to me being a ‘mother’. They are my round-the-clock, whole-year-through, personal feedback mechanism. Customized for me so that I can manage and strive for perfection in the various roles I play.  And to top it all I also get bonus rewards as various gifts for being a valuable daughter J.

The other day my mother was asking me about my credit card expenses. She has never understood why my expense pattern is high on credit and low on cash. Her argument is simple. If I have the money, then I can simply pay for my purchases and finish it off. Why bother about credit card bill payments and due dates. On the other hand if I don’t have the money, I can simply ask her and take it from her. J

My mother-in-law is a champion in the game of ‘spot-the-difference’. You miss one thing from the list of ’16-singaar’ and she is sure to spot it. If her son and I miss out on dinner dates for a few weeks, she flags it as a missed goal. And on days when we do manage to sneak out, I hear her voice as soon as I reach the door – you forgot to put on your lipsticks. J

"you have been on phone for long", "that bowl is too small, take a bigger one", "go slow", "did you eat your food", "you are always busy", "have you packed your bag", "do you need anything".......nothing much changed during the years I grew from 5 to 35....except that God felt the need of putting in place double supervision.

From mental to physical appearance, everything gets scrutinized. One encourages intellectual growth, the other brings in spiritual strength. From quality of life to quality of life-style, everything gets an upward push. 

Both these delegates of God regularly monitor my eating and sleeping patterns and also share health tips gathered from social media pages. They are also my reminder alarms - from taxes to utility bills, from grocery shopping to social obligations. None of my other managers have ever taken as much interest in my performance and growth as these two have. They micro-manage, they delegate. They criticize, they applaud. They are non-pardoning in their feedback. But they are totally involved in everything I do. Hands-on.

Sometimes I hate being micro-managed, and at times I feel thankful. From daily updates to regular reviews to occasional downloads - as much as I dread these, I cant survive without them. Yet my biggest lessons of people management have certainly come from these two. The way they have managed all our support staff, the relations, daily chores and me, is a living example for me to learn and imbibe. 

And they are one reason why even with a hectic schedule and tiring responsibilities, I manage to find time to write these pieces.

I am sure they’ll read it. And I will get my next round of ‘feedback’.