Likeable....Always!!!

It had been almost an hour and two cups of coffee for each since the discussion started. Not reaching a conclusion, we paused, and it seemed a long pause. Then Varsha took a deep breath and spoke every word as if trying to put pieces of a complex puzzle together, one after another. “I think this girl really likes you.”

My eyes literally popped out at those words. I couldn’t believe my ears. I know Varsha is my childhood friend. I also know that I have been an audience to all her wild thoughts and plans. But childhood for us is a long-forgotten memory. And the wilderness of our thoughts and dreams has transformed into a structured and constructive habitation.

“I really think she does!!”, Varsha continued, seeing my disbelief. “Look at you!! You can still be considered quite handsome. With your energy levels you still give a tough challenge to many worthy opponents. Long-time football champion and connoisseur of all-things-edible. You have an excellent sense of dressing too and your poise is an inspiration for many. You are every bit likeable.”

I was still looking at her with my eyes wide open. But after being showered with so many compliments it was difficult to resist a smile.

At her end, Varsha was staring in space and was trying to connect dots in her head. “You are intelligent, backed by strong academic qualifications and in-tune with current times. You have a great sense of humour and good communication skills. You are logical in your thinking and approach towards life. Financially independent and emotionally strong. You care about people around you and are a role model for many.”

“You are perfect. You have everything and more one looks for in a person. You are perfectly ‘likeable’. And even lovable. That’s it. You are perfect.” She gave me a broad smile having reached a conclusion.

“And I am many miles away from teenage.” I spoke for the first time. “I have more grey hairs than black. And my son is finishing his schooling, with my daughter just a couple of years behind him.” It was my attempt at restoring sanity in her. But none of this is news to her. Being my childhood buddy, she has been a witness to many a turn my life has taken.

Yet, what had gotten into her today, was beyond my mind and comprehension. At this point I could have given long speeches on western influence on our cultural heritage, but I refrained. I could have spoken about maturity of feelings and emotions that comes with age, but it didn’t seem necessary to someone who was in the same bracket of life. I could have spoken about the institution of monogamy and its merits, but she herself has been practitioner of it for long. I could have argued with her on mid-life crisis, morality and modernity, but wasn’t sure to what end.  

Western cultures have more acceptance for varied relations between individuals from different walks of life. It’s never too late to start and never too early to end. Closure home our value systems are still deep-rooted in our history. And we were not even talking about a relationship. It was just a hypothesis, which made it even more absurd, yet plausible. Two decades ago this may have sounded exciting. A decade ago, I may have still considered it as a compliment. But today is different. In my mind I had crossed that threshold long ago.

Fortunately, or unfortunately we have matured to an age where every emotion and every relation has its own space. Each has a specific meaning and we know how to respect its boundaries. Yet, at this level its sufficiently challenging to define new relations. Most get covered under the umbrella of ‘Friendship’. This could also be because most other slots are already filled by then. Yet world is filled with endless similar examples of unmatched connects. Some fructifying, some dying a natural death.

We had reached a point in this discussion where none of us was sure where it was heading to. We didn’t know what we were arguing for or against. Or what conclusions to draw. Was there a merit in even talking about it? We have seen enough life to distinguish between flight of intellectual gymnastics and on-ground realities. This would have led us nowhere.

Still feeling clueless on how to react, I switched on the television. News channels were reporting engagement of a famous actress with someone junior to her in success, fame and age. Media was digging out examples of famous personalities who have entered matrimony breaking social norms. Television screen was flashing series of faces, narrating stories behind some successful some unsuccessful relationships. A fan of the famous couple was supporting their decision, “she is a dream-girl for many. When so many people admire her, why blame the guy? She is liked by all.” 
At this point I noticed a naughty smile on Varsha's face. The smile of winning an argument. 

“Are you upset?” she asked as I switched off the television. Her voice was a mix of guilt, apprehension and confusion.

“No. But it doesn’t boost my ego either. I only have a control on my emotions. I can only respect others with theirs.”