What is my 'Type'?

We completed the test and handed over our sheets. The instructions were clear. Respond to all questions with complete earnestness and honesty. The results will be relevant only then. We tried our best. At least I did.

A few minutes later I was staring at my result. It was written in capital letters. As it always happens in a class, my neighbor peeped in my sheets. He was also my team-mate and a very good friend.

“INFP!!!???!!!” he exclaimed loudly. “What nonsense!! You can’t be this.”

He was loud enough to attract everyone’s attention. The corporate trainer came towards us. She looked at the piece of paper in my hand, with the letters ‘INFP’ written on it. She smiled, “an idealist type, reserved and shy, they are not known to do well in the competitive corporate world. What are you doing here?”

Before I could even utter a word, my friend pitched in. “Exactly! She is neither reserved nor shy. She talks to everyone on the floor.”

Both looked at me disbelievingly, expecting an answer. I had none.

It was the truth.

I am an introvert. I have been one all through my childhood. But then I realized that it didn’t help. It only made me lonelier. So I started opening up with people. I talked about all matter of fact things – from the sky is blue to grass is green. But I kept my thoughts to myself. It made me popular among my peers.

I am intuitive. I go by intuition. I have always planned for the big picture. I am happy in its completeness. It has helped me create set-ups which my peers could not do as they only thought of the small constraints and short-term bottlenecks. I climbed the corporate ladder as my set-ups worked well for the company. 

I feel. And I agree I have suffered because of it. I have also defied logic at times to conform to social implications. But then who doesn’t have draw-back? I take it as an area of improvement, which I am working on. Yet, it’s not a complete negative. This quality has helped me on multiple occasions to gain acceptance among masses, and has catapulted me to a leadership position.

I perceive. I delay my decisions. And it works wonderfully at times as I am open to all possibilities. My pre-determined choices don’t restrict me. I am open to new opportunities. New adventures as they come my way. At times I delay my work, losing out on valuable time.

The training ended, but my thoughts stayed with me. Does it matter what personality type I am? Can I and should I try to change it? Or should I do what people of kind are good at?

I think not. I only choose to improve. If I am INFP, then I just want to be better at it. Trying to become an ESTJ will not help me.

Disclaimer: I am not an INFP. With due respect to the work done by Myers-Briggs, I am happy with my type. I just want to be a better ‘Me’.

My Bonus Payout

I was in the middle of a discussion with my colleague, when my boss approached us. He was holding two envelops in his hand. Our years of experience instantly told us that it was the time for yearly bonus payout.

He smiled at us, handing over our respective envelops. “So what do you plan to do with it?” he enquired jokingly.

“Depends what is in it!!” my colleague retorted almost immediately. Boss smiled and left us.

I preferred to keep quiet.

I had been taught long ago, ‘what is in it will depend on what I want to do with it’.

It was more than a decade ago.

I was still in my first role of my first job. I had a long list of pending purchases, unmet desires and yet-to-be achieved goals. I was struggling to decide what to prioritize as a necessary expenditure, fitting in my miniscule budget. It was then that Mr. Agarwal, my boss at that time, came to me with my first ever bonus payout.

Just to give a brief introduction, Mr. Agarwal belonged to a family of accountants. An astute financial planner, he had inherited the skills in his genes.

Sticking to the cliché, he asked me the same question. “What will you do with it?”

I smiled sheepishly and told him that I am still trying to figure it out.

He patted softly on my back. “First decide what you need and what you want. Money earned without an objective is only greed. Proponents of higher morals may not agree with me. But it’s important to plan an increase in your expenses in order to achieve a healthy increase in your income.”

Now, almost a decade later, I am again holding this envelope. And now I know what to do with it.